The act of dating should be simple. Broken down it is really just an encounter that, if proven meaningful, could develop into something more than fleeting. “Should” is the operative word here, and like all shoulds, it is fraught. We live in a time of unlimited social barriers and access to an international bistro of prospects, yet we lack connection like never before. A new wave of dating Apps such as Happn try to address the bridge between the physical and the virtual, but it is still up to us to participate. The key to seduction is in the messages we send out and our fashion choices have a lot do with it. In a post-modern world where style can be interpreted in many ways and online photos can be misleading, how do we let people know we are genuinely interested?
To navigate the love-fashion connection, advice is best given from those in the know, and the French happen to do both rather well. Parisian-based entrepreneur Didier Rappaport is a trail blazer for virtual platforms, having co-founded the highly successful Daily Motion and now the latest form of social dating app – Happn. It was launched in January of 2014, with the help of partners Antony and Fabien Cohen. The latter was responsible for the Pigeons Movement, a social network that notoriously influenced the fate of French taxation reforms. My point being that they know how to connect people in a way that leads to real change. Hopefully this spirit of reform, of connecting the voice of the people to the powers that be, will translate into a connection between people themselves.
Happn‘s point of difference is not that it is a new invention, rather it is a capitalisation on the traditional forms of dating that required – shockingly- for people to meet face to face. Using GPS technology, it informs members when they cross physical paths with another dating hopeful. Basically Happn is the Sliding Doors moment of dating apps. Who among us has not experienced that transient spark with a stranger outside of our daily routine, most of which resulted in wonder or regret, rather than an actual date? That glimpse on a train that left us unfufilled and propelled singer James Blunt to write his hit song ‘You’re Beautiful’… Happn is about empowering the user to be brave, if not at the time then at least in hindsight. We don’t all possess the Frenchman’s ability to approach confidently but, if we do, then at least we’ll know our advances are welcome. In statement with The UK Telegraph, Chief Executive Didier Rappaport explains:
“We believe that we are an app for major cities. It’s interesting that where you have a huge density of people, it is really difficult to meet people”. “Happn is an app for misconnection. You have seen someone who, for some reason, you couldn’t talk to. Thanks to Happn, if the other person has the app, you will be able to find them.”
Of other apps in the dating world, arguably the most popular would be Tinder, an app of public profiles that can either be side swiped out of existence or engaged into online conversation / a desired meeting. The “swipe” feature has ingrained itself into popular culture. In response to its competitor Rapport would argue that:
“Tinder is a huge company, and they have created a really brilliant concept – the swipe – but when you apply the swipe to the human being, you transform the human being into an object”.
French intellectualist Jean Baudrillard’s called this social travesty early on with his theories on Post-Modernism. He observed a societal shift that occurred from the 1960s onwards, defining the point at which consumerism and the act of consumption led us to see people in a superficial light. According to The Gale Groups Encyclopaedia of Clothing and Fashion the theorist articulated a shift in focus to:
“The visual culture (material objects) and, later, on the virtual (electronic and cyberspace) culture”.
He saw fashion as shedding its utilitarian function and evolving into a form of communication in line with consumer thought. Fashion in one way or another has always projected meaning – be it certain colours that could only be worn by nobility or rich fabrics afforded only by the wealthy to uniforms that gave way your professional or religious standing. But post-modernism gave birth to a fashion of individual style, which has led to a confusion of origin and offers mixed signals. This form of liberty has come at a cost. In a way we’ve become inseparable from the products we consume and we now even self-market ourselves through social media. It is no wonder we’re jaded by the current dating world and are reverting back to more organic forms of meeting people.
Technology is a part of life and we are not shying away. Rather, in sharp contrast we are running towards, it growing apps like Happn exponentially year on year. To anyone who has avoided awkward stares in confined public spaces by looking at our phone (most of us!) it is clearly the preferred first step of engagement. Which makes fashion’s role in seduction more important than ever. Overt fashion or amped-up sexuality is not possible for everyone and can sometimes end undesirably. So designers like UK’S Dianne Harris have come up with subtle totems for singles to let others know they are available. In a 2016 Marie Clare interview the jeweller explains:
“SinglePin allows natural chemistry to flow. It’s a conversation starter, a beacon for connection and a prop to get things going on”. “It’s offering an alternative to online dating”; “more and more people want to get offline and meet in the real world, and SinglePin can help them do that”.
This idea feels like a modern day version of a historical brooch known as the “lovers eye”. In the 17th and 18th Centuries among the British and Europeans lovers would exchange the jewel as tokens of affection for those in clandestine affairs. They contained a miniature portrait of their loves eye, which kept discreet their identity and allowed the recipient to gaze into the eyes of their admirer. It goes without saying that even in today’s world we still desire that level of connection.
Hey, much as we love phone technology, perhaps we should just look up once in a while?
What steps have you taken to get noticed?